I love the repetitions, Lee. This isn't a sonnenizio but it feels like you've extended one of the charming things about the sonnenizio form, which is repeating and varying a word in succeeding lines. Here, you're chosen to repeat words to build a compelling, driving rhythm of cumulative power. Woohoo! :-)
Thank you, Ivy! I am appreciating your feedback very much. I like the movement in the middle parts of the poem, but I've decided to use an epigraph from Long's poem and then start lower in the poem to get things going faster.
I love the repetitions, Lee. This isn't a sonnenizio but it feels like you've extended one of the charming things about the sonnenizio form, which is repeating and varying a word in succeeding lines. Here, you're chosen to repeat words to build a compelling, driving rhythm of cumulative power. Woohoo! :-)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Ivy! I am appreciating your feedback very much. I like the movement in the middle parts of the poem, but I've decided to use an epigraph from Long's poem and then start lower in the poem to get things going faster.
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